I have to say this : people are not who you think they are. I find it hard to be too negative about trusting people and believing that they are sincere but lately it has become less hard. Several incidences have forced me to rethink my belief that most people are actually good and true. I used to firmly believe in what people who get friendly with me tell me. Maybe I am just naive or stupid but I usually did believe in the good. But not so much anymore. The people who I think are genuine have not turned out to be so. And that makes me a little sad that I can’t trust them.
So what happens when you can’t trust people? You nod along when they talk to you about something but you don’t agree to it in your mind. Or you play neutral and say that you would like to keep yourself away from whatever they are talking to you about. And I think that most people do know that I am kinda trusting. So, dare I say it, they try to take advantage of me using that knowledge. And I fall for it. Every goddamn fucking time. In most cases I think that it might not matter too much even if I fall for it. I can shrug it off after a couple of hours and not think much off it later. But some stick to me and I can’t forget them.
I remember some so vividly that they have shaped the rest of my life since that incident. Some regarding my friends and some regarding my relatives. I think I should just go about not trusting anyone at all for as long as I live! But then, what kind of life would that be?
Song for the day – “Never Give Up On Me” – JANN ARDEN