A Stone’s Throw Away

Ok, who came up with this term “just a stone’s throw away” ? Saying this term is to mean nearby or a short distance, ie. the beer store is just a stone’s throw away from here. But isn’t that misleading? Can everyone throw a stone at the exact same distance?

I can throw a stone much further than some people and a lot less than a lot of people. If I sit and throw a stone it won’t go much far. If I stand and throw it will go much further. If I wind up and throw or if I run from a distance and throw – the fucking stone will go much further! So the term isn’t very good is it? What if you are about to throw the stone and you get a cramp – chances are that you’ll just drop the stone a feet in front of you! Does the store now come to near your feet?

What if one of those shot-put athletes throws the stone? Have you seen the size of those guys & gals? Wait – have you seen the size of the stone that they throw? If they threw a tiny stone or a pebble, it might go into orbit! So is the store now in orbit around the earth? And how can I get there without a spaceship? This is getting to be an expensive trip to the beer store!

What about the size of the stone? I found a tiny stone and threw it- I couldn’t even see where it went. Then I threw a pebble and then a bigger stone. The distance kept decreasing as the size of the stone I kept throwing kept increasing. Different distances. But no one said that the stone has to be of a particular size!

In conclusion, don’t tell me that something is a stone’s throw away. Maybe I don’t want to throw a stone. Maybe I want to toss it. Unless it is Sharon Stone or Emma Stone!

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