I guess for the most part, I’m a the glass is half empty kinda guy! I think a lot of us really do not feel that we have most of what we want or need. And for many, many reasons (far too many to get through in just one blog post) I am far away fro what I want & need. I will always bee a my glass is half empty kinda guy.
Taking into account what I have, what I need and what I feel I should have and where I should be by now, I am off the point. I can use more water in that glass. Pour it, please. Universe, Roshan needs that glass to be more filled, atleast towards the three quarter point. Maybe a little bit more. C’mon, there are less deserving people and downright assholes who get so much more. I am thirsty.
And yet sometimes I feel I had a lot more than many others. Their glass is only a quarter filled. Or maybe just a few drops. Not enough to quench their thirst at all. My glass suddenly seems a lot more full. Sometimes!
The day shift or morning shift. This is actually more tiring than a night shift, for some reason. I think it’s because I have gotten so used to late evening shifts in the past 4 years or so that I just can’t wake up at 6 am and be thankful and good about it. This week I am working from 8:30 am to 4:30 pm for my training batch. I can leave by 4:30 pm if I want to but it looks like we have some clients visiting our center the next three days so I have to stretch.
I wake up at 6am and go the washroom, brush my teeth and then go make some coffee. I sit at my desk till 7:20 am and then go take a shower and shave and a dump and then get ready for work. I reach the office by 8:30 am and work till 9:30 am when I give my training batch and myself a little break. I get coffee or a snack and back to work till 12:30 pm when it’s a long lunch break till 1:15 pm. Lunch was terrible yesterday and today by the way excet for the huge fried fish they are serving.
Then it’s work till 3:30 and I give the trainees a coffee break before they wind up at 4:30 pm. I had coffee my self at 4:30 pm and then worked till 5:30 when I attended a meeting for 30 minutes. Then again I worked till 7:30 pm before going down and hailing a cab and coming back home. I am so tired.
I have this recurring dream – well, I’ve had it atleast 3 times in various formats. Long time readers of my blog should know that I love dogs and I’ve had a dog named Shawny, a golden retriever, for 11 years before she passed away in 2005. I loved that dog a lot as she was my best friend ever and I miss her every day. This dream therefore creates alarms in my mind.
In this dream I’m coming home from work or something and going to my old family house in Thrikkakara (another nostalgic hold, as I can’t seem to shake the images of my old house in my dreams even though it hasn’t been home since we sold it back in 2006) and as I pass the gate that leads into our front car porch / driveway I hear a bark. A bark? I don’t have a ….and suddenly I remember that I have not just a dog (a Labrador retriever) but also a puppy (a black dog, unsure of the breed) in large kennels at the back of my house.
And I realize that I haven’t fed them in ages and in horror I run and get some food and water and place the bowls in front of them and let them outta their cages. After they eat hungrily and gulp a lot of water, the two dogs gratefully start licking my hands as I cry in front of them.
In all the cases, I wake up soon after and wonder what this means.
I wish for many things most of which are not feasible and mostly flights of fancy. But this one wish is more practical and well, lots of people have similar dreams of such kind. Here is a simple wish; to win the big lottery!
Lots of money, lots of cash. Enough that I never have to go to work another day in my life. I just want the money, honey. So I want to win a few crores in the lottery and after the taxes – ka ching – I still should have a huge amount of money with me. More money that I would know what to do with.
I would instantly resign/retire from work and go and buy a new luxurious apartment. Two or three actually and make sure that my family is comfortable and have every thing that they need. I would get myself one of those large apartments and settle down with my new furniture. I’d adopt a couple of dogs and maybe a couple of kitteh’s as well. And I would enjoy a quiet life, doing whatever I want or nothing at all. Travel a bit. Stay in nice places.
What does a regular work day look like in your world?
I’m gonna give you the current way that it goes like at work since I am in the midst of training batches of new hired employees. This is my 4th such batch in a row and I think I might have 2 or 3 more before the year ends.
I arrive at the office by 4:15 pm and I head to the area where we keep our bags and stuff (you cannot carry your belongings inside the production floors or training rooms) and then I head to the cafeteria for my evening cup of coffee and a snack. At 4:30 pm I head to the training room assigned to me and the batch that I am training and then log in to the system, while the trainees log in to theirs. After greetings, I make them start their online course for an hour before starting the training sessions for the day.
I give them a break at 6:30 and after that we continue till 9pm when we break for dinner. Post dinner, more online courses while I work on reports and then I continue to take training sessions until 12 midnight. We wind up by 12:30 am and then I continue to work on reports till I can knock off for the night and hail an Uber/Ola and then head home.
Well after two weeks I was out again today. Finally got two days off together again so I could go out and enjoy myself.
First up I went to The Burger Junction and got myself a real burger. There’s a few places in Cochin if you want a nice juicy beef based burger and TBJ is the best of the best. I had a double patty with fries and a shake and it wasn’t even that heavy. I stayed there a while and then went to Marine Drive near the High Court junction and went to find the small furniture place where I had bought my bookshelf, slightly altered, to house my Star Trek starship models. I wanted a new one as I am starting a small but decent dvd collection.
So I went there, and it was a hot day, and sweated until I gave the rough measurements that I was looking at and they showed me a couple of shelves that they already had. Finally it was decided that they would make me one from scratch as I wanted something smaller and less wide. As they were taking more time, I said that I would called later in the day and get the final price (which turns out to be Rs.4,600). I then went to Center Mall and shopped for groceries and essentials in Big Bazaar. By then I was quite thirsty and bit hungry again so I went to Subway in the mall and had a sub and a large ice tea.
By 5pm I came back home and relaxed for the rest of the evening.
No but I had thought about it many years ago. When I was a kid I didn’t like my name. I wanted to change my name to Michael. Because of Knight Rider. Michael Knight! Hey, be glad I didn’t want to change my name to Knight Industries Two Thousand aka K.I.T.T.! I was 9!
But since then, no I like my name. Infact I love my name. Roshan – sounds so beautiful and sexy! I love the name to be honest with you. But I have wanted to change my surname as it’s my dad and grandad’s name that is added to my first name. It doesn’t make sense to me. I would have preferred to have the name Menon as my last name and a few years back I was almost about to get it changed officially.
But I didn’t and now, I guess it’s too late and so I don’t care.
I came across this site that publishes answers to frequently asked questions to atheists or about atheism or about atheists. I decided to see if I can provide my own answers, so these are just my personal answers.
1. Can you prove that God doesn’t exist?
A. How can anyone prove something doesn’t exist when it hasn’t been proven to exist in the first place? And it doesn’t work like that. Prove your god or gods exist.
2. What would it take to prove to you that a god exists?
A. Proof. Solid proof. Not some quotes from a book or how many people believe in it or “look at the trees/baby’s smile”. And no amounts of threats will do the job either.
3. How do you know you are right?
A. I don’t. That’s why I say I do not believe in your god. How can that be right or wrong? You say that a god exists and I don’t say that no gods exists, just that I do not believe because of a lack of evidence.
4. Why do atheists support gays so much?
A. I don’t. I support every human who wants to his or her life without harming themselves or anyone else. Gays, LGBT, Transgenders – they deserve to be happy (same as you) and live their own lives (same as you) without you hindering/hurting/killing them. If they don’t harm you, how on earth does it affect you?
5. Have you tried to believe in God?
A. Yes, my parents tried to indoctrinate me into their religion, same as yours probably did and for a while it worked. Then I turned 13 and started questioning. At the age of 19 I became an atheist. I still don’t believe that any god exists.
How do you remember and honor loved ones who have passed?
While I understand some of you attach religious ceremonies to remembering and honouring lost loved ones, I don’t feel that it makes any difference. As an atheist I do not believe in the unproven place called heaven (or hell, because I am sure that the husband of one of my aunts, is in hell or pathaal if there is such a thing and justice prevails) and when you die, you stay dead and it’s like the time before you were born. You stop existing!
Having said that, the grief of losing someone you care about doesn’t go away just like that. I choose to remember the good times and say a cheers in the memory of the person. Especially if they liked to drink. Also, like for example there are a couple of movies that I associate with people who have died and whenever I watch those movies, I remember them. Or other stuff like sports or music.
Other than that, try and live up to their examples and expectation whenever possible and never forget what they meant to you.
So I have to work today, a Saturday. While most of my colleagues and team members are at home and enjoying their weekend, because of a mistake someone else made, I have to work this Saturday and the next. Imagine that!
Scheduling mistakes led to this. Hence the current training batch I have assigned to me were given Tuesday and Wednesday off and I took only Tuesday off. Now I have to work along with the 27 new hire employees today and on the 3rd, meaning 6 days next week, because of this.
Ain’t life grand! I was planning a movie marathon for this weekend, watching stuff on my new tv and getting some beer, some pizza or fried chicken and really enjoying my weekend but this week and the next the plan is out.
Well I have the tv installed. I spoke to the installation guy this morning at around 10:30 am while I was drinking coffee and he came here by 11 am. It took an hour to install the tv on a wall mount and show me how to connect to the internet (normally using wifi but since I don’t have wifi, I opted to connect the tv to my phone’s hotspot.
I installed a couple of apps for Youtube & Hotstar via the aptoide tv app for Android televisions. This works out great. But my very first act was to check on playing movies via a thumbdrive and ofcourse I picked Star Trek as my very first movie to run on it. It looks great.
Well this is where the new tv is gonna go. As you can see from the outline, I used to have a painting there. Well not a painting but a 3D image of two birds inside a large frame. That has been moved to the living room.
This wall is now almost blank now, except for the small painting on the right and the switch board on the left. Pretty soon my new tv is gonna be mounted there.
Well the tv is here. It was on time and all that. So I ordered the tv from Flipkart on the 11th of October and the delivery date was given as the 24th. Which was yesterday and sure enough, in the morning at around 11 am I was sent a message saying that “your order for the Mi TV is out for delivery”.
The guys delivered it at around 1:30 pm and about 90 minutes later I received a call from the local support company that Flipkart has and the lady on the phone asked me if I got the package. I said I did and could you arrange the installation for the next day – today – between 11 am and 3pm since I have to leave by 3:30 pm to go to work.
I will tell you one of my favourites. I was about 12 years old (I think) so this was 1988 and my family – dad, mom, sis and I – were going on a long summer vacation trip with our extended family on my mother’s side. Uncles, aunts, cousins and my grandma and us were all going in two 16 seat vans (or mini-buses) and 1 car.
As we were getting ready and just waiting to leave, my older sister was telling my dad that we had too many bags for her and my dad to carry and that they were heavy too. So my dad said that “Roshan will have to catch something” meaning when they toss the bags into the large van, I will have to catch them and keep them to one side. I was walking in at that time and only heard what my dad said about me catching something. Not knowing what they were talking about, I said “What? A cold?”
And they both started laughing for a long time and me, I was just standing there, annoyed since I didn’t understand.
Well I have finally done it! I have dipped my toes into the dvd collection world and made my first proper purchases of dvds. So, usually I would get pirates copies (what are sold as dvds but are copies with cheap print outs of the dvd covers) and the Torrents ofcourse, like most of India and the developing world does. But things have changed a lot since then. Now we have legal options for downloading or streaming movies like Sony LIV, HotStar, Amazon Prime or Netflix. While those are getting really popular and are available for less money on a monthly or yearly basis, I still crave the physical media.
So on checking prices for movies on dvd online in both Flipkart and Amazon India, I finally made my first 3 purchases. I wanted them to be from the original movie series but it’s still Star Trek and that’s fine in my book. So I bought the Kelvinverse trilogy movies of Star Trek (2009), Star Trek: Into Darkness (2013) and Star Trek Beyond (2016) on a great deal. They are individual cases and all that, though I do remember seeing a box set I think. But these are for great prices on a limited deal. Infact, I could have gotten it even cheaper had I placed the orders last night. But I waited till morning and thus lost the Star Trek Beyond dvd that was selling for a cheaper rate.
It’s gonna be slow and I won’t be able to afford to buy many dvds on a monthly basis but I will build my collection. Blurays are out of the question for now. But someday that too will be easier to buy.
Just like I predicted, this long weekend did not pan out like I had hoped to at all. I slept a lot, especially last night which was about 9 hours. That is crazy! I never sleep that many hours on regular days. Anyways, I ended up feeling like I lost 2 days of the week and only today did I go out and get stuff.
I went out this afternoon at around 12:30 pm and the plan was to meet up with a few former colleagues and friends for a long overdue lunch. However that was not to be as one friend had a death in the family and was called away even before he could reach and the other person had a sick child. So the remaining 3 of us called it off and postponed it for another weekend. I went and got a pizza for lunch.
Post that I went to Big Bazaar and got some shopping done for groceries and stuff. Then as it was a hot day I treated myself to a nice sundae and then I came back home to relax.