A frog and a scorpion were sitting on the bank of the River Jordan. “Hey frog,” said the scorpion. “I need to go to the other side of the river. Would you carry me across on your back?”
“No way,” said the frog. “If I let you come close to me, you’d sting me and kill me.”
The scorpion said, “That would be stupid. If I stung you while we were in the river, we’d both drown.”
“Hmmm, that’s true,” said the frog. “OK, hop on.”
So the scorpion climbed on the frog’s back and they headed out into the River Jordan. Halfway across the river the scorpion stung the frog.
“What did you do that for?” cried the frog, as they were both going down for the third time.
“I couldn’t help it,” said the scorpion. “This is the Middle East.”
— “Boss, can I leave work two hours early today? My wife wants me to go shopping with her.”
— “That’s out of the question.”
— “Thanks, boss! I knew you wouldn’t let me down.
3 people died and went to Hell. One of them is from America, the second guy is from Germany, and the third guy is from Afghanistan. The devil lets each person make a phone call to their loved ones in the country they came from but they will be charged. The American spends 10 minutes on the phone and is charged $20. The German spends 12 minutes on the phone and is charged $24. The man from Afghanistan spends half an hour on the phone and is charged nothing. The other two guys asked the devil why. The devil responded: “Local calls are free”.