Ted 2

Ted 2 is a 2015 American comedy film directed by Seth MacFarlane and is a sequel to the 2012 film Ted. The film’s screenplay was written by MacFarlane, Alec Sulkin, and Wellesley Wild and stars Mark Wahlberg and MacFarlane, both reprising their roles from the original film, as John Bennett and his sentient teddy bear friend Ted respectively and Amanda Seyfried. The film also sees the return of Giovanni Ribisi and Jessica Barth, reprising as Donny, Ted’s stalker, and Tami-Lynn, Ted’s wife. We have supporting roles from Morgan Freeman, Giovanni Ribisi, Sam T Jones (playing a fictional version of himself), John Carroll Lynch, John Slattery, Patrick Wharburton & Michael Dorn with a cameos by Nana Visitor, Tom Brady, Liam Neeson, Jay Leno & Jimmy Kimmel and narrated by Patrick Stewart.

The movie starts off with Ted getting married to his love Tammi Lynn but John is depressed having gotten a divorce from his wife Lori who isn’t accepting of Ted. One year later, their marriage is beginning to break down so they decide to have a child. As Ted cannot have children, John agrees to help Ted find a sperm donor. They ask Sam J. Jones, but he refuses due to a low sperm count. Then they try unsuccessfully to break into Tom Brady’s house and steal his sperm. Ultimately, John offers to donate his sperm (something that Ted wanted to ask him but hesitated due to John’s divorce). Ted & Tammi try adoption but are rejected because of their drug records and as a result of the background check on Ted, he loses his legal status as a person. The state authorities of Massachusetts declare Ted property rather than a person, resulting in the loss of his job at a grocery store. Furthermore, his marriage to Tami-Lynn is annulled by the government. John suggests that they take the state to court, and their case is assigned to a novice lawyer pro bono, Samantha Leslie Jackson. The three bond over their love of marijuana as they prepare to present the case.

Meanwhile Donnie, longtime nemesis and stalker, working as a janitor at Hasbro convinces the CEO to hire an expensive and able lawyer to ensure that Ted maintains his status as property, therefore leaving him open to seizure by the firm to create more living teddy bears. Samantha argues well but the jury comes out against Ted as a person. Disheartened but determined, the trio decide to contact Patrick Meighan, a highly respected civil rights attorney, hoping he will take the case and overturn the court’s decision. Driving to Manhattan to meet him, Ted crashes into a hidden marijuana patch, where Samantha and John realize their attraction for each other. The next day, the trio meet Meighan, who is sympathetic to Ted’s plight but ultimately refuses the case, as he believes he has not significantly contributed to humanity due to his juvenile slacker lifestyle. Ted is devastated and jealous of John & Samantha’s new relationship and walks on in anger. He runs into Donnie, dressed up as a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle, at ComiCon who tried to kidnap him. Before he is captured Ted is able to call John on his phone for help.

John and Samantha arrive at Comic-Con and search for Ted, arriving as Donny is about to cut him open. As they make their escape, Donny cuts the cables holding up a model of the USS Enterprise and it swings towards Ted. John pushes Ted out of the way, takes the hit, and is knocked unconscious after being pinned under a TV wall. Donny is arrested after Ted identifies him among other Ninja Turtle cosplayers. At the hospital John’s heart stops beating for a bit and he is resucitated but not before he pulls a prank on Ted, Tammi & Samantha, pretending to be dead! Meighan visits the, saying he had a change of heart after seeing what happened on the news. He is able get the ruling overturned by demonstrating that Ted is self-aware, that he feels complex emotions, and is capable of empathy. Outside the court, Ted re-proposes to Tami-Lynn. After they are re-married, Ted and Tami-Lynn, adopting the surname of “Clubberlang”, adopt a baby boy, whom they name Apollo Creed, while John and Samantha happily pursue their own relationship.

Funny with crude, sophomoric comedy and rude gestures and bromance at it’s best. Ted 2 is good enough for a Saturday afternoon watch for me. Not as great as the first one, I’ll give it a 7.5 outta 10!

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