Wanted: Lawn Mower For Use

There’s this house on the side of the highway that I pass by twice a day, on my way to work and back again. Whenever I go back home and sitting on the left side of the bus, I always make a point to look for the house as we pass it. The house itself is not grand; infact it’s an older looking house, much the ugly duckling compared to some of the houses near it. But in the front porch of the house I see this middle aged guy lounged in an easy chair, the kind in which you can easily lie back and fall asleep. Put a pillow at your head and you will be snoozing long before you can even think it.

This guy, I’m sure retired from whatever work it was that he was doing, is always there in the evenings, half asleep and not bothered with whats happening on the road or the world. Everyday I pass by a little after 6pm he is there, legs raised high and shirtless with just a towel hanging over one shoulder. He has his arms folded behind his head, showcasing his armpit hair to the world. Seemingly without a care in the world. “I’ve worked a lot in my life and now I’m retired and I don’t care about what’s happening elsewhere. Every evening after a cup of tea, I wanna take a snooze out on my front porch and lie back and if you wanna admire my hairy chest & armpit, you are welcome”.

Just what is it with a certain section of society here in Kerala where men once they are past 60 & retire always have to be near the side of the road bare-chested, showing off their salt n pepper hairy chests. Are there women who are flocking to see them? Do they have a fan club? Women throwing themselves at these older farts “oh he is such a MAN! I love an older man with grey chest hair. It’s so manly!!!” What the fuck assholes!! Next time I see an old jerk baring his chest in public, I’ll take a lawnmower and shave his chest!! Hell, I’ll run the lawnmower up his ass as well, them stupid idiots!!

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