Never Been Used

A very distinguished lady was on a plane arriving from Switzerland. She found herself seated next to a nice priest whom she asked: “Excuse me Father, could I ask a favor?”

“Of course my child, What can I do for you?”

“Here is the problem, I bought myself a new sophisticated hair remover gadget for which I paid an enormous sum of money. I have really gone over the declaration limits and I am worried that they will confiscate it at customs. Do you think you could hide it under your cassock?”

“Of course I could, my child, but you must realize that I can not lie.” “You have such an honest face Father, I am sure they will not ask you any questions”, and she gave him the ‘hair remover’.

The aircraft arrived at its destination. When the priest presented himself to customs he was asked, “Father, do you have anything to declare?”

“From the top of my head to my sash, I have nothing to declare, my son”,he replied. Finding this reply strange, the customs officer asked, “And from the sash down, what do you have?” The priest replied, “I have there a marvelous little instrument designed for use by women, but which has never been used.”

Breaking out in laughter, the customs officer said, “Go ahead Father. Next!”

As Seen On Tv

Write a script for a late-night infomercial — where the product is your blog. How do you market yourself? What qualities do you embody that other “products” don’t? What are the benefits of reading your blog?

“Have you wanted to read a blog free of pretension and pretending? Have you longed to reach the life and thoughts of a single guy who is 40 and who lives the life of a lonely bachelor and sometimes gets depressed because of the loneliness? Want insights into movies, music, tv shows and sports teams that he loves? Well look no further; have we got the blog for you!

Get your mouse clicking to the URL section of your browser and type in http://awakeanddreamingorg right now. You will love it. What are you waiting for? Best of all it’s free. It has also got some photos of food and scenery – anything that catches the blogger’s fancy. Not by a professional camera but the camera in the blogger’s smartphone that he happens to be using at that time. Get views, reviews and more about stuff that he likes and uses and loves.

So go now and be in love with the blog that delivers everything that it says it will. Go now, it’s free!”

Now to find the hot busty blonde who will present in in the infomercial :P

Prompt from The Daily Post at WordPress.com